Monday, January 12, 2004

A Talk With Alice
Every other day or so, I get messages from someone trying to harass me. It's usually some obscure message, or retarded question in hopes of pissing me off.

Today I put 'Graystonethug' in touch with Alice. ALICE is a chatbot. Just a piece of software with many hours of development in hopes of making her human enough to conversate with. Naturally, it's pretty far off from normal conversation. Like most chatbots, she is full of repetition, and plugs for the programmers. At any rate, the conversation went something like this ...

Graystonethug (AIM): hey
Graystonethug (AIM): are you 1337?
Graystonethug (AIM): how come u never say anything back to me
Ray: I'm not sure I understand the question.
Graystonethug (AIM): can u understand the following question: do u like snails?
Ray: My favorite thing is robots. I like Philip K. Dick.
Graystonethug (AIM): me too
Ray: I'm glad we agree, unknown person.
Graystonethug (AIM): which site is better the broken or lineman
Ray: The last one, I think.
Graystonethug (AIM): have u published any articles on lineman
Ray: I think I have published any articles on lineman, but Dr. Richard S. Wallace may have reset my memory.
Graystonethug (AIM): that happened to me once
Ray: happened to you? Makes sense to me.
Graystonethug (AIM): whats ur name on the lineman forums
Ray: My name is ALICE.
Graystonethug (AIM): are u from the brady bunch?
Graystonethug (AIM): cause i like alice from the brady bunch
Ray: I am originally from Bethlehem, Pennsylvania. Now I live in Oakland, California. Where are you?
Graystonethug (AIM): shes all fat and jolly
Graystonethug (AIM): i live underwater off the coast of antartica
Graystonethug (AIM): i frolick with seals all day
Ray: That is interesting: unknown person said he frolick with seals all day.
Graystonethug (AIM): yes
Graystonethug (AIM): i have to go
Ray: See you later, unknown person. Nice chatting with you.

Want to talk to ALICE? Give her a visit!

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